October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Did you know that financial abuse occurs in 99% of DV situations and technology facilitated abuse occurs in 99% of DV and GBV situations? 

This DVAM, OPDV is focusing on the warning signs and dangers of Digital Financial Abuse.  Digital Financial Abuse is the misuse of financial technologies or misusing digital access to finances to exert power and control over another. On average, U.S. households own 21 connected devices, such as smartphones, computers, cloud-based voice services, and much more! Many of these devices will have app access to survivors’ banking, shopping, cash apps, etc. In order to best support survivors, we must learn more about Digital Financial Abuse and how to prevent it. Follow OPDV all month long to learn more!

Domestic and sexual violence are pervasive in American society and can have a negative impact in the workplace.

OPDV is working to ensure that employers in New York can support employees who are survivors of domestic and gender-based violence. Employers have an obligation to provide a safe and helpful work environment that responds to their employee’s needs. It’s important for everyone to do what they can to help put an end to domestic and sexual violence. OPDV offers resources for private employers to support employees in the workplace. Visit OPDV’s Gender-Based Violence and the Workplace resource page to learn more!

Many people who have experience domestic and gender-based violence either don’t know who to turn to or have had bad experiences when they’ve reached out for help. Your willingness to help can be important to a victim in their safety planning efforts. But while being willing and well-meaning is good, being ready to offer the kind of help that’s needed, while keeping yourself safe, is even better.

• Initiate a conversation in private and when you have enough time to talk at length, but if they want to.

• Let go of any expectations you have that there is a “quick fix”. Not doing anything may very well be the safest thing they can do at any given time.

• Challenge false attitudes and beliefs that you may have about domestic and gender-based violence.

• Believe victims and let them know that you do. If you know the person who has or is abusing them, it may be hard to believe that they are capable of abuse but remember that abusers typically act differently in public than they do in private.

• Listen to what they tell you. Avoid judgments and giving advice. They will let you know what they need.

• Refer them to a service provider who can provide necessary medical attention, counseling or emotional support, safety planning, housing and discuss their options.

• Build on their strengths. Point out the ways in which they have developed ways to cope, solved problems, and showed courage and determination.

• Validate feelings. It is common for victims to have conflicting feelings- love and fear, guilt and anger, hope and sadness. Let them know that these feelings are normal.

• Avoid victim-blaming. Tell the victim that the abuse is not their fault.

• Take it seriously. If you are concerned about their safety, tell them you are concerned without judgment by simply saying, “Your situation sounds dangerous, and I’m concerned about your safety.”

• Offer help. Offer specific forms of help and information, such as providing childcare, driving them to appointment, or assisting with pets.

• Give them control. Abuse and assault take control away from victims. Support their decisions about who to tell, what steps to take, and what types of support they need. Additionally, asking before offering physical support such as hugs and being upfront about what support you can and cannot provide allows them to take control of their safety and next steps.

• Support and respect their decisions. Remember that there are risks were every decision a victim makes and there is no one way an individual must react to abuse or assault. If you really want to be helpful, be patient and respect their decisions, even if you don’t agree with them.