Overview
Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month is an opportunity to speak to the young people in our lives about healthy relationships and to show those who have been impacted by teen dating violence that they are not alone. This year, we focus on the dangers of technology-facilitated abuse, and we are launching our online interactive story, “Choose Your Own Adventure: Spot the Flags.” This interactive story can help teens recognize healthy and unhealthy relationship dynamics. We invite you to follow and share our social media, participate in our online interactive story, wear orange on February 11 for Teen Dating Violence Awareness Day, and use the resources on this page to help you be an ally this February and all year long!
Choose Your Own Adventure: Spot the Flags
OPDV launches “Choose Your Own Adventure: Spot the Flags”, an online interactive story to help teens recognize healthy and unhealthy relationship dynamics. This online interactive story allows participants to make choices and direct the outcome of the characters’ relationship. As the story progresses, they learn about healthy relationship choices, how to respect boundaries, and ways in which red flags can present themselves and affect a relationship. Participants can play through multiple times, making different decisions and seeing the variety of possible outcomes. We encourage everyone to share this valuable resource with teens they know and help us build healthy relationships!
TDVAM: Healthy Relationship Quiz
OPDV created the Healthy Relationship Quiz to allow individuals to learn how to spot and navigate Red and Green Flags in an intimate relationship. OPDV’s Healthy Relationship quiz allows participants to choose responses to multiple scenarios to learn about healthy (Green Flags) and unhealthy (Red Flags) choices in intimate relationships. Individuals who take this quiz will receive a “healthy relationship” score at the end and important information about why responses are Red or Green Flags.
Go Orange!
February 11 is Wear Orange for Teen Dating Violence Awareness Day! To show support for survivors and help spread the message, wear orange, hang orange lights, and let others know why orange is so important on this day! If you post on social media, be sure to tag us @NYSOPDV. On February 11, keep an eye on the night sky as NYS landmarks are illuminated in orange.
Know the Resources
New York State’s Teen Dating Abuse Awareness and Prevention Website
It can be hard to have the tough conversations with those you care about, but when you have the right tools, you can make a difference. Visit New York State’s Teen Dating Abuse Awareness and Prevention website to learn more about what dating violence looks like and how to find resources!
NYS GBV Resources
Did you know that every county in New York State has a domestic violence program? They provide resources for teens as well!
Did you know that there are tons of resources available for victims and survivors from Orders of Protection and Address Confidentiality Programs to Financial Assistance and legal advocacy?
Talk to an advocate today to learn more about what’s available, and make sure to share this information with the survivors in your life.
Engaging Men & Boys
Active participation of men and boys is crucial in the effort to eliminate gender-based violence. Historically, men and boys have not always been prominent in this effort, but by engaging with them around this topic, men and boys can fulfill a crucial role in ending gender-based violence.
This toolkit provides definitions, conversation starts, and resources to “Start the Conversation” with the men and boys in your life.
Post on Social Media
Follow @NYSOPDV on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and LinkedIn, and engage with posts by sharing, liking, and commenting using the hashtags #TechAbuse, #TeenDatingViolenceAwareness, and #TDVAM2025. You can also post the social media graphics below and show the people who follow you that you’re an ally to survivors. When posting, include information for the NYS Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline which can be reached 24/7 in most languages: Call 800.942.6909, Text 844.997.2121, or chat at opdv.ny.gov.
Be an Ally all Year Long
Many people who experience teen dating and gender-based violence don’t know who to turn to. Your willingness to help can be important to a victim in their safety planning efforts. Be ready to offer the kind of help that’s needed, while keeping yourself safe at the same time.
- Initiate a conversation in private and when you have enough time to talk at length, but if they want to.
- Let go of any expectations you have that there is a “quick fix”. Not doing anything may very well be the safest thing they can do at any given time.
- Challenge false attitudes and beliefs that you may have about domestic and gender-based violence.
- Believe victims and let them know that you do. If you know the person who has or is abusing them, it may be hard to believe they are capable of abuse but remember that abusers typically act differently in public than they do in private.
- Listen to what they tell you. Avoid judgments and giving advice. They will let you know what they need.
- Refer them to a service provider who can provide necessary medical attention, counseling or emotional support, safety planning, housing and discuss their options.
- Build on their strengths. Point out the ways in which they have developed ways to cope, solved problems, and showed courage and determination.
- Validate feelings. It is common for victims to have conflicting feelings- love and fear, guilt and anger, hope and sadness. Let them know these feelings are normal.
- Avoid victim-blaming. Tell the victim the abuse is not their fault.
- Take it seriously. If you are concerned about their safety, tell them you are concerned without judgment by simply saying, “Your situation sounds dangerous, and I’m concerned about your safety.”
- Offer help. Offer specific forms of help and information, such as providing childcare, driving them to appointments, or assisting with pets.
- Give them control. Abuse and assault take control away from victims. Support their decisions about who to tell, what steps to take, and what types of support they need. Additionally, asking before offering physical support such as hugs and being upfront about what support you can and cannot provide allows them to take control of their safety and next steps.
- Support and respect their decisions. Remember that there are risks with every decision a victim makes and there is no one way an individual must react to abuse or assault. If you really want to be helpful, be patient and respect their decisions, even if you don’t agree with them.